Tony Hart welcomes you to 'The GLC
Gallery - Part IV'
"Tony Hart, original clart, back in this the 'art nouveau' window on the Cyberweb. Well kids, you've been keeping me busy and this time round, it's no exception. The good news is that I've now got my own personal mailbox, so if you want to send your marvellous shit in (and of course, I would love you to), then click here. In the meantime, let's get our priorities right - did you come here to debate aesthetics, argue imagery over content and then contemplate the works of the Great Masters...? Of course fucking not, so here's the next part of the neverending saga that is the GLC Gallery....."
"A quite striking caricature of Newport's finest, Adam Hussain. Mr. D Eyre yet again leaving nothing to chance or the imagination. We have the Chain, we have the Draw, we have the Tracksuit, but what makes it all the more special for me is the 'font-style' signature at the bottom of the piece. Reminiscent of crap birthday cards that elderly relatives send, it also prompts me to tell you of early posters of Kevin Keegan that may have been available in kids' photographic publications such as 'Look-In' or 'Roy of the Rovers'. It captures the very essence of our man in the Chain (apart from the beret and tache)"
"An artist who goes only by the sinister pseudonym of 'Nobby' sent this historic work in, picturing established ragga DJ Rhodri Morgan. Created before this master musician's meteoric rise to fame, we observe an early 'community workshop' of sorts, where DJ Rhodri explains the 'Definition of Safe' and tries to advise his subjects on how the GLC represent Newport 'through areas'. The slightly-furrowed brow and animated hand gestures speak literal volumes of this man's hardcore street knowledge"
"Simply amazing. Mr. J Rees here transforms Sir Saville from a basic BBC correpondant to 'Guardian of All Things Safe' with the addition of four simple words. I too used to use this artistic exercise in everyday conversation, selecting words at random to be used after an original statement. Thus was I ejected from Ferris' Fish & Chips after demanding a large chips, wank-twat-cunt-machine"
"Comrades in arms reluctantly assist this poor rugby fan after another suspected typhoid incident down the kebab house. It's remarkably odd, but fast food and disease always appear to be inextricably linked as far as Newport's concerned. This is the central message behind Daddy L to the R's recent work. You can believe in what you like, but if you start to live kebabs, burgers and other reclaimed meat products then you have to be willing to face the consequences. On a personal note, I prefer eating, drinking and then passing out in my posh indian takeaway"
"C'est formidable...! Well done to budding artist, Ali Rok for capturing this wonderful moment in the flesh. Not only are the children wearing the green and gold of this old 'Port, but their bold statement is made using the colours of the rainbow as well - a good education all round. If you look closely at the children in question, you might make out the young scamp holding an 'O' - it would appear that he misinterpreted the photographer's original request of 'Stand straight and smile' as 'Stick your tongue out and jump in the air'. A vision of beauty and childhood innocence, captured to confuse people for generations"
